I'm seriously falling apart

OKAY.. this is just weird.. bt i jz realized that i was act doing th same thing what my ex did to me last time.. -.- i mz admit, i get jealous very easily bcuz of her these days. wells, after realizing what monster i've changed into, i think i'm jz gonna relax fr this few days. Everything's not going the way i've been expecting now and i think i gotta get away from all d stress fr a short period of time. (or not) it's killing me. i dun wanna lose her once more. i dun wanna take the risk agn. Bt i get a feeling that i'm jz overreacting all the time. sigh~ Is everything going to end like this? Arent stories end happily? I really hoped that it's nt gonna end this way. i really wanna be with her. It's jz tht i overreact at times.. which quite piss her off i think... :/ i bet the "fuck youuuuuu" she wrote on her wall was fr me... i'm falling apart right now. It's complicated.. VERY complicated.. Well.. tht's life.. It's nt going to be easy anyways.. Wells, hope she understands what i've been doing. like i said all the time, I dun wanna lose her agn. D: Sigh~ ' If you truly love her, don't let her go no matter how hard the situation is' should be the best quote to keep me hanging on.

screw tht nigel dude

NIGEL's an ass... -.- I called shermane piggy... Then he called her piggy too.. -.- wtf is this? She told me tht he knws I like her. And he still wanna use d name I gave her? + he's beatboxing and DJ-ing? Wtf is this? Wtf is wrong with him? He wants to get her, I'm ok. We're jz competing with each other jz fr shermane. BT HE ACTUALLY FUCKING USE THE NAME I GAVE HER.. -.- fuck this shit.. I'm fucking pissed right now.. And don't mind me for using the F word here... Cz I'm really really pissed already.. Why can't you jz get in line and wait for her? I waited fr shermane fr like.. 2 mnths+ already... And now you're coming in to break us off? No way I'm ever gonna let this happen. Since u think u're older than me, doesn't mean u'd get everything first. All I wanna tell u is, GET THE FUCK OUTTA SHERMANE'S LIFE YOU FUCKING BASTARD. I DONT WANNA SEE YOUR RETARDED FACE NOR HEAR YOUR NAME FROM SHERMANE'S MOUTH. GET LOST! o0o and I mean it

OKAY... i'm seriously falling apart..

GREAT... nw another guy likes shermane.. -.- screw this shit... and maybe the other dude too.. -.- GREAT... now i have two or three more competitors... -.- OH FML... i'm seriously falling apart nw.. gonna get mental breakdown soon enough.. -.- WHY MUST SO MANY THINGS HAPPEN TO ME RIGHT NOW? WHY CANT MY LIFE BE SIMPLE, JUST THE TWO OF US? WHY MUST IT BE SO COMPLICATED? WHYYYYYY!!!!!!! grrrrr... -.- screw this shit.. i'm out

Wait For You - Elliot Yamin

I never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I'm missing you
& I'm wishing that you would come back through my door
Why did you have to go? You could have let me know
So now I'm all alone,
Girl you could have stayed
but you wouldnt give me a chance
With you not around it's a little bit more then i can stand
And all my tears they keep running down my face
Why did you turn away?

So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you wanted to be

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

It's been a long time since you called me
(How could you forget about me)
You got me feeling crazy (crazy)
How can you walk away,
Everything stays the same
I just can't do it baby
What will it take to make you come back
Girl I told you what it is & it just ain't like that
Why can't you look at me, your still in love with me
Don't leave me crying.

Baby why can't we just start over again
Get it back to the way it was
If you give me a chance I can love you right
But your telling me it wont be enough

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

So why does you pride make you run & hide
Are you that afriad of me?
But I know it's a lie what your keeping inside
Thats not how you wanted to be

Baby I will wait for you
Baby I will wait for you
If it's the last thing i do

Baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

I'll Be Waiting

Please just reply me

Today's my worst day ever... I just gt fked up real bad by my dad.. -.- stupid mom, blame dad fr buying me this phone, he gt pissed and fk me up. I'm already moody enough.. Shermane din even reply me fr 1 hr+ already. I'm worried. Why can't they jz understand hw I feel? Why must they be so naggy? I really need you right now. Please reply or talk to me. I'm getting frustrated with myself.

won't let you go again~♥

When you look at me, baby I could see,
That you're fond of me, oh baby don't you agree?

You were standing there, oh~ I'm aware, that I fell for you, oh please accept me do.

Rap: uh, I knw tht u hav him, I hope it is a dream, I tried a lot of times, bt I jz can't get you off my mind. I regret fr wad I did, I still feel sorry for it, life without you is hard, it's jz like catching a dart. I think u'd understand cz I won't let you go again.

When you look at me, baby I could see, that you're fond of me, oh baby don't you agree?

You were standing there, oh~ I'm aware, that I fell for you, oh please accept me do.

Rap: uh, I miss u everyday, I miss you in everyway, I love you, I need you, I care abt u, and I will wait you, no matter what u do, no matter whatcha say, love will be the same, it will nvr change, I hope you'd understand, cause I won't let you go again,

When you look at me, baby I could see, that you're fond of me, oh baby don't you agree?

When you're standing there, oh~ I'm aware, that I fell for you, oh please accept me do... Let this love begin, won't let you go again~~

Hey guys, this is th song I wrote fr shermane( first song :o) took me long enough to finish it.. Bt it's still worth it. :D ♥

getting more and more crazy ovr her everyday. (:

I saw you, I want you, I got you, I like you, I loved you, I lost you, I miss you... It's true.. Tht quote IS according to my situation (: wow.. Can't bliv I'm actually getting crazier ovr her everyday. No wonder other people say when you lost something/someone very important in your life, and when you get a second chance, you'll appreciate and treasure it no matter what happens. Wow.. I guess it IS happening to me.. o.o wells, I'm still regretting till nw and then... :/ most probably the biggest mistake I'd ever made.. I think it's stuck in my mind fr th time being.. :/ sigh~

whee~ jz gt myself a dslr camera. :D

Yay~ dad gt me a dslr camera! :D and it's a nikon D90 :DDDD took loads of pics ytd. :D bt still gotta learn d techniques of photographing.. -.- lazyy.. Pfft..

I dunno what to bliv. :/

Hmm.. My horoscope app's quite accurate abt th situation I'm having right now.. And it's telling me not to second-guess.. And it's actually progressing bt it's jz nt obvious to me. And it told me to embrace the fact tht I did my best and it will soon be rewarded.. I'm lost right nw.. :/ HELP PLSS~

It's not making sense

I feel totally lost right nw. D: Everything that's going on between us is not going as what I was expecting. I get a feeling that you're ignoring me, or you're just in a bad mood and you don't wanna tell me abt it. I dunno what to do.. You told me don't simply think. I jz can't. Everything's not going the way I wanted it to be. I get a feeling tht more and more guys like you. I don't wanna lose you once more. D: can anyone pls guide me?

wtf... I'm pissed..

There's like this dude who passed msg wit shermane on wed.. (Mentioned on my last two post) yea.. His fren called her dai sou.. -.- wtf.. Swtt... Tht dude must have nothing to do.. Another lifeless bastard..-.- he seriously need to get a life. Nobody messes with my shermane.. Or in other words, my piggy. To everyone who's reading this. Don't think I'm not open minded enough. Wait till you lose someone once, then you'd get a second chance. Thn he/she will be very precious to you (I mean it). I really cared abt her. GOSH.. I think I really gotta settle with this dude.. -.- lifeless retard. I knw tht fren of urs like shermane. Bt u still gotta knw she has a choice right? She cn choose not to accept him. Why call her dai sou? Use ur brain and think. I don't really wanna settle this d hard way. Really gotta talk to tht dude abt this. Shermane doesn't like you. Fuck off. stuck between two guys' already worst enough. Don't interfere. I dun wan shermane to suffer even more. Pls, jz stop getting her, and tell ur fren to stop calling her dai sou.

Lesson learned frm my past mistakes

Yes... The title says it all. I've learned a very important lesson frm tht mistake I made last june. Most probably th biggest and worst mistake I'd ever made. I think I mentioned this before in one of my last post(bad memory.. Sry! ><) Wells, I learned to make my decisions properly nw.. Especially in situations like th past one.. Must seriously think a lot of times before I make my decision. Wells... Besides tht, being loyal and faithful's oso essential.. Tht's all fr nw.. Will post somemore ltr. :)

Am I thinking too much?

I jz dunno why.. Bt I always get a weird feeling that shermane likes other guys besides ap and I. Maybe I'm just thinking to much... She told me she only likes the two of us, no others and don't simply think. Bt I jz can't.. There's like this other dude frm tuition. He likes her, and was like writing this paper message thing to her. Telling her tht he likes her, and he has her pictures on his thumdrive.. -.-(shermane told me tht) I was like swtt.. No wonder he was like asking me if I like shermane or not th other day.. -.- no way I'm going to lose shermane again... I can't take the risk once more. I don't wanna let her go anymore. I love her a lot.

untitled

Wells, thank god that i'm going to be her next boyfriend(officially next boyfriend). Bt still, i still feel bad over what i did that time. I understand how she feels when someone she likes doesnt want to be with her. I just dont even knw what i'm doing that time. it's like i'm being controlled to leave her, and go for sze instead.-.- only time matters the most now. the consequence i get is she's with another guy, and i have to wait for her no matter what happens.( i mean it) i tried talking to my friends about it. Bt all they tell me is, never give up! or Dude, give up. You'll never get her... -.- i feel really lost right now, and i really someone to guide me through my hardest times..(most probably shermane herself) i just love her. and the sad thing is, i only get to see her 3 times a week.. 3 TIMES. and i dont really get to talk to her as she usually talks with her friends and i usually talks to mine and our own gang are like not very familiar with the other.. so, yeah.. i just miss her alot. hope she understands hw i feel right now

i've been regretting ever since i let her go D:

Yes... the title says it all.. i let her go last june... and it's the stupidest thing i'd ever done. not to mention, worst too. :/ At first i thought that sze yie was more important than shermane, and so i chose sze instead of shermane.(which makes her felt that i dont love her anymore, and then she accepted her boyfriend now) It was a very big mistake.. I seriously felt like crying now.. everytime i think of it, tears will just start rolling down.. (i knw i'm a guy, bt i jz cant control my emotions) Losing someone whose very important in your life(shermane) is most probably the worst thing you'd ever done. sigh~ i guess this is just fate.. At first i thought she was nothing to me, bt as time goes by, i'd just realized that she was the most important person in my life. Yes, i am still regretting for what i did and i still cry everytime i think of it. :/

In LOVE Once More

Has anyone of you ever fall in love? i bet everyone does... even birds do.. well... i sorta like met this girl from my tuition centre. She was awesome.(i mean it) her name's shermane. Wells.. i sorta like fell in love with her since last year... you can say that it's love at first sight..(yes it is) and now, she's my one and only. nobody else can ever cross my mind.. I knew she was just the girl for me.

LAZY

GAAAHHHHHHHH!!!! TOO LAZY TO BLOG! ( i knw i din update it) i usually tweet more than i blog.. so... yeah.... tweet name's nicisconfused btw. >< yes yes yes.. i knw i get confused easily at times.. bt i'm still myself right? uhuh.. i am... :D